I HATE it

I hate to feel this way, but i feel shitty right now.I do not know the real reason, and why am i so cranky.Everything doesnt seem right, everything just not good and irritate me.It sounds crazy and ridiculous,but this is what going inside me.I feel rejected,i feel filthy, i feel that everything around me is a big mess.I know this kind of feeling,i been through it.All i need to do shut myself up and let it pass just like the storm over the night.It will be a new bright day again when the sun rise.Yes,indeed...a day of hope and happiness.

This feeling remind me of a dream which i used to have when i was a little girl.I was in a room,with many things pilling up high.I tried to remove something and caused the pile of things to fall with a loud bang.The room was in a mess, a big mess.I didnt know what to do, i was in daze.I tried to clean the mess but it was impossible.I cried, i started hearing people screaming at me and pointing their fingers at me.I tried to say sorry,but no one listens.Yes,it was scarry.it was so scarry that it woke me up wet with sweat and tears.

Why such feelings re-appear after so long?