Khengy-Challenging day and more ahead

It is indeed a chalenging day for her today.She's been vomitting a lot and not able to rest well the whole day.It pains me seeing her suffer so much while knowing that it is only the beginning and there's more to come in the future.I know that we, as her family members need to be very strong for her,yet i cant help it but to feel really sad and helpless. I do not know why am i so weak and i feel really angry with myself!Taking care of a cancer patient who is your beloved aunt is really hard,it is not as easy as what we seen on the TV.We only see a caption of what is happening in the TV,but there's a lot of emotions and hidden feelings inside which are not visible.
These few days i've been like a robot,my brain just doesnt function and i still feel dis-oriented. i feel like crying all the time,although i keep reminding myself to be strong.I feel l ike screaming my head off,so that it will take away my frustration.Idont know,can anyone tell me how to face all these? This is only the beginning,and the worst is yet to come..yet i feel like a total loser.
Well...time will heal.This is what i keep telling myself.One day i will be numb with all these and i will be able to do watever i need to..yes..it will