Weekend activity

I learned how to make fruit tart and fruit cake!! i mean real cake(those you can get from Bread Talk), just that it's not that professional since it's my first attempt and my sifu's brain is a bit rusty after not baking for many many years.Well, generally i feel happy to keep myself busy.It's better to divert my attention to something else than to think about all those unhappy things.Yes, it was a right choice!
Hmm..now that my sifu has left and all the activities are over, i feel sad. I didn't know why i thought of those bad things again, and about my bad dream.
I feel like crying but bro is here, i cant.i have to hold it back.I didnt sleep last nite, i kept thinking and havign bad dreams.lots of them..Why?
I thot that i have gotten over it..haven't i? Why am i still feeling like tht?
I shouldn't have!
Disappointed with myself..